Future Retirement Success
  • Politics
  • Business
  • Investing
  • Stocks
  • Politics
  • Business
  • Investing
  • Stocks

Future Retirement Success

Politics

Elections are temporary. Family is forever. Here’s how to keep politics from driving you apart

by September 22, 2024
September 22, 2024

Our divided nation is dividing families. Robert F. Kennedy Jr.’s family – even his wife – are appalled at his support of former President Trump, and Tim Walz’s brother, Jeff Walz, has declared that his brother’s progressive ideology is the reason he hasn’t talked to him in eight years. 

The emotional loss of family and friends damages our mental health; the divisiveness among colleagues can poison the workplace.

This is not new. In the Civil War, it was not uncommon for a brother to fight his own brother. Our Founding Fathers often viciously disagreed. But they created institutional checks and balances to compensate for what they could not modify personally: our inability to hear opposing perspectives without becoming defensive. 

With my background as a Ph.D. in political science who has also conducted couples’ communication workshops for the past 30 years, the search for a solution intrigued me. 

I saw that historically speaking, when we heard criticism, we feared a potential enemy. Therefore, building defenses was functional for survival. But for love, it’s just dysfunctional.

To transform civil war to civil dialogue with loved ones and friends, we need to develop behaviors that alter our natural biological propensity for defensiveness. Until these behaviors are practiced repeatedly, few people can practice them for more than an hour, but that is long enough to leave our friend or family member feeling heard.

With feedback from workshop participants reporting what did and didn’t work in their real lives, I developed a ‘Caring and Sharing Practice.’ Since it is easier to hear criticism after we’ve been appreciated, the process begins with the first person who will be expressing her or his perspectives (or ‘criticism’) sharing two appreciations of the other at five levels of specificity.

For example, Tim Walz’s brother or RFK Jr.’s sister might recall not just how curious their brother was, but share a specific childhood story. They could highlight their respect for how their brother consistently asked follow-up questions and had the courage to speak up about his beliefs without fearing rejection.

The next step begins with the understanding that ‘every virtue taken to its extreme becomes a vice.’ Prior to Walz’s and RFK Jr.’s sibling expressing their aversion to their brother’s perspective, they would search for the original virtue that motivates their brother.

Jeff, as a critic of ‘progressive feminism’ would search for the sister or daughter whose life is more fulfilled by opportunities feminism helped create; Tim Walz, as a ‘progressive feminist,’ might search for the virtue of Jeff emphasizing the importance of dad and faith to both children and their mother.

Prior to the core practice, I ask political opponents what they have in common. The answer? They all care. No one is apathetic. Caring enough to be actively involved is crucial to the sustaining of democracy.

Now the key ‘Caring and Sharing Practice’ begins: since it’s biologically natural to become defensive when receiving criticism, I ask the person receiving the feedback to first alter their natural state. They meditate using six specific mindsets.  

For example, I call one mindset ‘The Love Guarantee.’ Walz and RFK Jr.’s siblings might say, ‘The more I provide a safe environment for my brother’s perspectives, the more he will feel loved by me, and in turn, the more love he will feel for me.’ 

The listener then signals when they feel completely receptive and secure. If they ‘lose it’ they say ‘Hold’ and resume the conversation only after they’ve found a mindset or two that recenters them.

Once Walz and RFK Jr.’s siblings have heard their brother, they share what they heard; then ask if they distorted anything. They keep working at it until Walz and RFK Jr feel nothing is distorted. 

Then they ask if they missed anything, and finally, ask if they wish to add anything. Once Walz and RFK Jr. feel completely heard, they reverse the process for their siblings.

At the completion of the process, each sibling shares two more appreciations at five levels of specificity.

None of this requires anyone to change their mind. Only to leave someone they care for feeling understood and seen in the way they understand and see themselves.

Elections are now. Families are forever.

This post appeared first on FOX NEWS
0
FacebookTwitterGoogle +Pinterest
previous post
Kamala Harris plans to skip historic Al Smith dinner despite long-standing tradition
next post
Kirby slams Hamas chief Sinwar as ‘the major obstacle’ to cease-fire, hostage release deal with Israel

You may also like

New Mexico to end COVID emergency March 31

March 4, 2023

Trump reacts to Secret Service director resigning: ‘She...

July 23, 2024

Vin Diesel, Tommy Lee, Jermaine Jackson hit with...

January 7, 2024

White House: Eli Lilly’s insulin price cap shows...

March 2, 2023

Vance says India-Pakistan conflict ‘none of our business’...

May 9, 2025

Biden Funnels Millions to Terrorists as New Jersey...

November 24, 2022

University of Florida Protesters Interrupt Never Trumper Ben...

October 10, 2022

Donald Trump fires National Portrait Gallery director for...

May 30, 2025

Tulsi Gabbard, former Democratic candidate for president, joins...

October 23, 2024

Tom Cotton slams ‘partisans and obstructionists’ in DOD...

November 26, 2024

    Get free access to all of the retirement secrets and income strategies from our experts! or Join The Exclusive Subscription Today And Get the Premium Articles Acess for Free

    By opting in you agree to receive emails from us and our affiliates. Your information is secure and your privacy is protected.

    Recent Posts

    • How to create an inspiring workspace

      June 26, 2025
    • Jill Biden’s ‘work husband’ runs for cover as privilege protection crumbles

      June 26, 2025
    • Poll: Majority of Republicans back Trump’s strikes on Iran; most Americans fear getting dragged into war

      June 25, 2025
    • Senate Republicans look to sweeten Medicaid pot to silence dissent on Trump’s ‘big, beautiful bill’

      June 25, 2025
    • Judicial nominee shuts down ‘wildly inaccurate’ claims that he’s Trump’s ‘henchman’

      June 25, 2025
    • Tesla’s European sales fall for a fifth month in a row

      June 25, 2025

    Categories

    • Business (8,315)
    • Investing (2,072)
    • Politics (15,806)
    • Stocks (3,168)
    • About us
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms & Conditions

    Disclaimer: futureretirementsuccess.com, its managers, its employees, and assigns (collectively “The Company”) do not make any guarantee or warranty about what is advertised above. Information provided by this website is for research purposes only and should not be considered as personalized financial advice. The Company is not affiliated with, nor does it receive compensation from, any specific security. The Company is not registered or licensed by any governing body in any jurisdiction to give investing advice or provide investment recommendation. Any investments recommended here should be taken into consideration only after consulting with your investment advisor and after reviewing the prospectus or financial statements of the company.

    Copyright © 2025 futureretirementsuccess.com | All Rights Reserved